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Role-Playing Beginner? 17 Role-Play Sex Ideas To Get Started

By: Melissa Miller , May 13, 2024

Dressing up and pretending you’re someone else is always fun. Why do you think people like Halloween? And, Halloween sex? Yes. Role-playing in the bedroom can be a fun way to keep things interesting and explore fantasies, whether it’s doctor and nurse or something more. This is a beginner’s guide to role-playing for any type of relationship.

What is role-play in sex?


Role-playing in a sexual context involves individuals assuming specific roles or personas to act out fantasies. It can range from simple scenarios like playing doctor and patient to more elaborate fantasies involving different characters, settings, and power dynamics. Role-playing can add excitement, novelty, and a sense of adventure to sexual encounters by allowing participants to explore different aspects of their sexuality in a safe and consensual way.


A 2015 study said only 22 percent of people have tried it, and a staggering 60% of people have never even tried holiday role playing.

What makes sexual role-playing so hot?​


Sexual role-playing is like the staycation of sex – a brief step away from real life to spice things up, but you aren’t leaving town. It allows people to step outside of themselves, safely fulfill fantasies, or act out scenarios that might feel taboo for them. It also adds variety and excitement and offers an escape from reality all while being with someone you trust. 


Exploring your sexual desires with someone can also deepen your intimacy with them and let you know yourself better. And, it can become an outlet for creativity within your sex life. You can try out the surface level things of being with someone new, while still having the trust and rapport with a partner. It’s like having your cake and eating it too.

How to roleplay and get started


There are some things you need to consider as you learn how to have roleplay sex. Firstly, you’ll want to consider your boundaries and what you are open to. You may want to establish a safe word. It’s essential to communicate this to your partner and learn about their boundaries and what they’re open to. Discuss what you both want to get out of the experience. 


Here are some questions you should consider for yourself and discuss with your partner when learning how to role-play: 


  • What fantasies or desires would each of us like to explore through role-playing? 

  • Am I comfortable with the idea of sex roleplay, and do I feel emotionally safe exploring this with my partner? How comfortable is my partner with the concept of role-playing?

  • How open are my partner and I in communicating our desires, boundaries, and expectations regarding role-playing? 

  • Are there any specific boundaries or limits that we need to establish beforehand?

  • How can we ensure that we both feel safe and respected throughout the experience?


In order to get started, you’ll need to choose a scenario or type of role-playing and consider what you’ll need to support the session. 


  1. You can consider themes and roles that align with both interests and comfort levels. (See fun options below.) 

  2. Will you need props or toys? This could be costumes, sex toys or maybe something to transform the room a bit.

  3. Consider the ways you can prepare both together and separately. Do you want there to be an element of surprise or use the prep as foreplay? 

Make sure you’re checking in with each other before, during, and especially after. After can be part of aftercare where you’re winding down together, getting hydrated, and discussing what you both liked and look forward to. The intention here is to connect and feel safe as yourselves.

Sex roleplay ideas for beginners


There are two different routes beginners can take in their role-play sex – character play and scenario play. Character is focused on each of you being specific people while scenarios center on an exchange or setting. Sex role-play ideas are endless. You can pick broader themes or stick to something specifically special to you and your partner. 

Sexy role-play characters and scenarios

It’s sexier to choose different characters or scenarios from the beginning and can almost be the beginning of your foreplay. Intention, effort, and effective communication around sex make for better sex overall. It can also add variety to a relationship while being with a trusted partner and exploring more together. Here are some characters you can play as:


  1. Teacher and teacher’s pet
  2. Executive and assistant 
  3. Handyman and housewife 
  4. Casting couch cameraperson and porn star
  5. Cheerleader and football player 
  6. Specific characters from TV, movies, anime, etc.  


Here are some scenarios you can try out:


  1. Strangers going home from a bar together for the first time
  2. One of you losing your virginity
  3. Seducing the hot delivery person
  4. Masseuse giving a massage that leads to a happy ending
  5. Hypnotist hypnotizing other person and controlling them 
  6. A hero of some sort saving the day – Superman, firefighter, etc. 


Different types of role-play sex to try

As we’ve established, roleplay sex allows you to explore all different types of sexual fantasies, desires, and fetishes, and you can have different sessions to try a variety of sex. 


  1. Dirty role-play sex – For any couples who keep it fairly “vanilla,” adding naughty in front of any character can bring the dirtier side out. Naughty nurse, naughty school girl, and naughty firefighter are some good options. 
  2. Roleplay sexting –  This can include themed dirty talk and roleplay sexting, sexting as if you’ve just met each other at a bar or online,  or even sexting before you get to the bedroom.
  3. BDSM roleplay – This is good for BDSM beginners and can be practiced in any character setting with a dominant/submissive power dynamic. Some examples are playing as a boss and employee or a teacher and teacher’s pet. 
  4. Exploring fetishes – Roleplay sex can help you explore different fetishes as well. Pretending to be a masseuse can open the door to exploring a foot fetish, or being a chef and taste tester can be an intro to food play or sploshing. 
  5. Starting outside of the bedroom – You can take your roleplaying to the next level by trying to be in your roles before you even hit the sheets. Dress up differently, wear a wig, meet out at a bar, and take home your partner while you stay in character for all of it. 

Sex role-playing tips for your first time


Here are the basic roleplaying tips to keep in mind for your first time:


  • Consider changing locations – a different room at home, a hotel room, going to their place if you’re normally at yours, etc. 

  • Establish a safe word beforehand. 

  • Don’t be afraid to enthusiastically get into character. 

  • Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. 

  • Respect your partner’s and your own boundaries. 

  • Extend yourself grace if you break character or pause. 

  • Use your imagination!

  • Be honest and gentle about how it went for you after. 

  • Always prioritize aftercare!

Sex role-playing when you’re single

Role-playing isn’t just for couples. It’s for anyone you have established trust with in sexual relationships. If you don’t have a role-playing partner, you can also utilize dating apps to find people who are into the same types of sex roleplay ideas you are, or you can indicate on your dating app bio that you’re open to having new experiences with someone who can teach you new things about it. You can find others who share your desire for sex role-playing on

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